Things I’ve learned from being off Facebook

I went off Facebook in April 2014, after I realised just how much time I was spending wasting on the site. This ended up being a really good decision for me, because it meant that I was better able to concentrate on my uni work and other things that constant scrolling had been taking me away from.

 

Here’s some of the things I’ve learned in my time off of Facebook:

  1. Most people won’t even notice you’re not there.
    I put up a “hey guys, I’m disappearing for the foreseeable future, please text/call if you need me” post when I bailed off, and STILL everyone was surprised when I’d say in conversation “remember, I’m not on Facebook at the moment”.
  2. You WILL miss some important announcements, unless you have someone who is keeping tabs on stuff and can update you.
    Between Hubby and my best friend, I managed to keep mostly up-to-date with the really big things (babies, engagements, etc), but I did miss a few things. I missed several birthday parties because they only did Facebook invites.
  3. Sometimes, Facebook really is the best way to keep in contact with family.
    I have a HUGE family on my Mum’s side – she’s the oldest of 6 kids, and everyone has at least 2 kids, and most of the ones over 18 have long-term partners. Not being on Facebook meant I had honestly no clue what was going on with them unless my Mum told me.
  4. You will find out who is really your friend.
    The friends that actually care and want to still catch up with you will text/call. My “friends” list has reduced to about 6 or 8 people compared to while I was on Facebook, and I can’t say I’m particularly sorry – I prefer having a few good friendships than having heaps of superficial ones.
  5. I increased my “other social sites” use, but not by a significant amount.
    I found that when I initially got off of Facebook, I had a steep increase in the amount of time I was spending on Tumblr, Twitter and WordPress, but that reduced after a few weeks – when you don’t follow a thousand people, there’s only so many new things that will turn up on your feed when you refresh it.
  6. Now I’m back ‘on’ Facebook, I’m not checking it anywhere NEAR as often as I used to.
    I’m only doing 1 or 2 scrolls per day now, and I think that this is a sustainable amount. The time I’ve spent without Facebook seems to have broken me of the constant-checking habit.

Things I’ll be doing differently this year:

  1. I won’t be completely bailing this year – instead, I will be making changes to the things that turn up in my feed.
  2. I will be un-friending and un-following people.
    There are some people I can’t un-friend without creating a shitstorm, but I can remove them from my sight.
  3. I won’t be posting very much, even when I’m on there.
    I honestly find that there is very little I want to share on Facebook – the time away has given me a new insight into just how shallow and RIDICULOUS a lot of posts really are. I found that I didn’t even want to share some of my really exciting stuff (YAY I got a 6.0 GPA and got invited to the High Achievers lunch) because I didn’t want shit to hit the fan – I know that there are people who would take it as a slap to the face, rather than be happy for me. Maybe I’m over-thinking that, but I just can’t be bothered dealing with that crap.
  4. I will not have the app installed on my phone.
    I still have the app installed on my iPad, but not on my phone. On my phone, I am too likely to just randomly scroll because 80% of the time my phone is where I can see it.
  5. No notifications
    The only Facebook notifications I’ll be getting are the Facebook Messenger ones, because I have a few friends who prefer to use Facebook messenger so they can save on credit. Fair call.
  6. Facebook calendar sync.
    I have turned on Facebook calendar sync, and I’ll keep it on this year, even if I go off Facebook for all intents and purposes – because that way, I shouldn’t miss out on the birthdays/celebrations I did last year.

~K

Goals for 2016 – addendum

After some thought, I’ve decided that I need to add a couple of things to my original 2016 Goals list.

Both these items are going under the “Health & Beauty” section.

  1. I’m going to give the “capsule wardrobe” thing a go. I tend to wear the same stuff day-in, day-out anyway, so I figure I’ll just make this a conscious rather than unconscious decision. I’ve got a few items that I need to purchase still, and I’ll be doing that once I’m working, but otherwise I’m pretty much good to go.
  2. I’m going to have another go at the 5:2 diet. I tried it last year, and I sort of got a bit slack and just stopped doing it. This year, I’m going to re-read the book and borrow the recipe book(s) from the library and properly plan my fast days. Maybe it will work better for me this time.

Both these items were inspired by a slight freak-out I had on Saturday.
I was trying to get ready to go out to the city with Hubby and a couple of friends, and I originally thought I’d wear a dress. Which is when I realised that pretty much all my dresses (all but 2 being hand-me-downs) either didn’t fit properly or were in colours that don’t match most of my accessories. So I thought, since it’s a cooler day (for summer), I’ll wear jeans and a nice shirt. The first nice shirt I selected was another hand-me-down, but one I absolutely ADORE. It’s gotten these weird spots all down the bit where the buttons do up and around the collar. The option was a red blouse with short flippy sleeves – it looks awesome with jeans, and is SO my colour. BUT it’s a bit thin so you need to wear a white or skin-colour bra underneath… and my ONLY bra in that category that actually fits me is a sports bra and GUESS WHAT… The fabric around the edges of the bra cups has discoloured, so you could see it through the shirt. AAAARGH by this point I was having a horrible time and was sorely tempted to cancel dinner, because I just felt fat and awful. I ended up wearing a button-down shirt that was a little less dressy, but still nice. It worked, but the sleeves were a little tight when I first put it on (they always are, it’s cotton so it stretches a bit once it warms up) and that just made me feel 1000% worse about all of it.
At least my jeans fit!

So, after all that chaos I decided that I need to do something about my wardrobe. I clearly have a large number of items that I just don’t wear, for whatever reason. I need to cull them and replace them with things that I will wear. Enter the capsule wardrobe idea. This was closely followed by the thought that there’s not much point making a capsule wardrobe if I still feel fat and gross. The 5:2 diet seemed to work reasonably well while I was using it last year, so maybe it’s time to give it another go.

Sadly, the “buying new clothes” thing will have to wait until I’ve got a job and am earning my own money. In the meantime, I’m just going to get rid of the stuff that I don’t like wearing or can’t clean up and work out what I need to buy to fill out my clothing options.

~K

Goals for 2016

Here’s my goals for this year! I’ve used the same categories as I did for 2015, because they still fit the best with my life.
I’m posting my goals here, because having them where you guys can see them keeps me accountable.
I’m thinking that this year I’ll do a monthly progress post (or at least try to), with how well I’ve managed to keep up with doing these things.

Relationships – anything to do with how I relate to other people
Organisation & Management – things that relate to how I manage time, money, and life in general
Health & Beauty – mental and physical health, fitness level, things that I associate with making myself ‘pretty’
Creativity – things I enjoy and that give me a creative outlet
University/learning – anything connected with study

Relationships

  • write to my grandparents at least once every 3 months
  • date night with Hubby at least once every 2 months
  • catch up with friends once a month

Organisation & Management

  • plan my week every Sunday
  • stick to my morning and evening routines
  • maintain my weekly “cleaning day”
  • continue meal planning every week

Health & Beauty

  • clear out any clothes in my closet that I have not worn in the past year
  • only buy clothes that fit my style and I truly love
  • go to the gym at least 3 times a week
  • 2 strength training sessions a week
  • lose 1kg per month (total aim for the year – lose 10kg)
  • meditation for 10mins, 3 times per week
  • go to bed before midnight
  • get up before 7am every morning

Creativity

  • minimum 2 blog posts per week
  • 2hrs per week recreational reading
  • finish my fair isle jumper in time for winter (finish by May)
  • design a vest from the fair isle jumper pattern

University/learning

  • Get a job as an AIN
  • Maintain my 6.0 GPA
  • keep up to date with my lectures & readings each week
  • spend at least 3hrs on Japanese study each week

~K